“How Do People Change? Over time. With stops and starts, along a crooked line. With practice. With ambivalence. More often than not, without formal help. When the trade-offs seem worth it. With a little help—sometimes a lot of help—from friends and family. With anguish. With effort. With joy.”
― Jeffrey Foote, Beyond Addiction: How Science and Kindness Help People Change
“The question is not ‘why the addiction’ but, why the pain?”
— Dr. Gabor Mate
“Not all addictions are rooted in abuse or trauma, but I do believe they can all be traced to painful experience. A hurt is at the centre of all addictive behaviours. It is present in the gambler, the Internet addict, the compulsive shopper and the workaholic. The wound may not be as deep and the ache not as excruciating, and it may even be entirely hidden—but it’s there. As we’ll see, the effects of early stress or adverse experiences directly shape both the psychology and the neurobiology of addiction in the brain.”
Addiction has its roots in the seeking outside of ourselves to fill a void that has occurred within.
Whether through substances or behavior, addiction starts with an attempt to relieve pain, to find relief from the suffering we are enduring.
When the present moment is intolerable, the drug/behavior of choice liberates us from the burdens of the past and fear of the future.
Addiction is an enchantment that offers the promise of euphoric feelings and great rewards while hiding consequences.
The behaviors/substances that are soothing us are also harming us. Eventually, we can’t function without them, we need them just to get through the day. They consume us, we structure our lives around them but the search to soothe our pain through external sources is endless, because the solution comes from within.
“The opposite of addiction is not sobriety, it is human connection.”
― Johann Hari, Chasing the Scream: The Search for the Truth About Addiction
There comes a time when managing addiction is no longer sustainable or desirable.
There is a strength within that calls forth the desire to get back on the path of the true self.
Recovering the True Self from addiction is a maturing process.
We learn to get comfortable with discomfort, accept things as they are, allow vulnerability, and renew our sense of purpose.
As we emerge from the hold our addiction had on us we can embrace the experience, learn from it, and draw strength from it.
The suffering and hardships endured test the outermost limits of the human experience.
When we have re-aligned with our true selves and have meaning and purpose in our lives we are connected to community and the world in ways that are fulfilling.
We have integrated the addiction experience and have resources to process trauma and regulate stress and overwhelm in ways that keep us balanced.
“The cure to addiction is consciousness. Consciousness is freedom.”
— Dr. Gabor Mate
DISCLAIMER: All content on this website is for informational purposes only. Janice McInnes Coaching provides integrative coaching to individuals and supporters of individuals navigating transformational experiences such as psychedelic journeys, meditation retreats, holotropic breathwork, holistic treatments, personal development workshops, and other psycho-spiritual events. Janice McInnes Coaching does not recommend, screen, or approve people for psychedelic therapy. Coaching is intended as supplemental support and is not a medical service or a substitute for professional treatment or counseling…read more